T-Mobile & Motorola Vs. The Garage - Round One

There are times in life when one must take off the gloves and wage war with no mercy. I am taking off the gloves and there will be no mercy. Now you may ask who I am waging war against…and the answer is simple…T-Mobile and Motorola. Now, I am sure you all have heard of these two companies and I am sure there are those who have already taken their gloves off. So, here is my dilemma. I purchased a Motorola A630 from T-Mobile in April of 2005. Of course, I was not eligible for an upgrade so, I was charged the full price of around $350.00. I am not some Neanderthal when it comes to caring for my cell phone. I do not throw them around, sit on them, chew on them, or use them as a doorstop. I am gentle on them, carry them carefully, and try to avoid dropping them all together. I figure hey, it is my investment in the phone, so I better take care of it. Now, I have had fairly good experiences with Motorola phones in the past so, I figured (in retrospect incorrectly) that I would have another good experience from them…little did I know. Hindsight is one of those beautiful things. It let’s you look back and make a decision with complete knowledge of the future, absolutely beautiful; however, absolutely worthless when you actually have to make a decision. So, I purchased the phone and went on my merry way. However, in August a slight obstruction, in my merry way, cropped up when my phone stopped charging. Now, I am technologically rather together; so, I quickly deduced that there was an issues with the charge connector in the phone and that the “juice” was not getting to the battery. So, I took it to T-Mobile and they were nice enough to order me a replacement. At this point 100% satisfaction was on my mind. What can be better, a phone stops working and they send you a new one…beautiful. So, a few days later in August I receive the new phone and send the old one (the damaged one) to the cell phone graveyard…compliments of a fully padded box and pre-paid postage. So, August was good and then the natural progression of the year took me to September and then into October. So, late October rolls around and guess what? “Houston We Have a Problem”. Low and behold the phone stops charging again. Now, as you can imagine a phone that has no battery is about as useful of a communication tool as a rock. So, I fidget with the thing over the weekend (October 29^th and October 30^th) and alas…nothing. So, today (November 1, 2005) I take a little trip to T-Mobile and explain the situation to a nice sales associate named Autumn. Now, Autumn is unable to do anything from the store. Which is extremely frustrating, but totally understandable, because gone are the days when a store can apparently make things right for their customers. So, she calls T-Mobile Customer Service and I get connected to what I will refer to as the “single most unhelpful individual” I have ever encountered. Now, this person was so unhelpful that I will refer to him as SMUI from now on. If you didn’t follow that one look at the quotation marks above and you should piece it together. So, SMUI tells me that the only thing he can do it send me another replacement. Of course, SMUI fails to see that if two A630s have gone bad on me in less than 6 months that I probably don’t want to get another one. Also, SMUI gives me the brilliant advice of buying a new phone. Of course wouldn’t T-Mobile love this? Every time a phone (that they sold you) gives you a problem – you just go buy a new phone. Wow, I am sure that is great for T-Mobile, but it’s not so great for the consumer. So, after going around and around with SMUI for about 15 minutes I asked to speak to his supervisor. Now, I want to stress here that I never raised my voice and remained cordial the entire time I was on the phone with SMIU. However, I had to talk to his supervisor after he failed to piece together that if T-Mobile sent me a replacement that I was indeed on my second phone and not on my original phone. Hey, I am not saying that I am the smartest guy in the world, but even a 3^rd grader can piece together that if something is replaced that you had to have an “original” one and that you get a “replacement” to REPLACE it. However, I guess SMUI failed 3^rd grade. Whatever. So, I get transferred to Dwight. Now, I will say this about Dwight, Dwight understood where I was coming from and could at least follow my points and generally could keep up with my conversation. Dwight, I appreciate your help, I sincerely do…but, even you have to admit I am still taking one where the sun don’t shine. So, after explaining the situation to Dwight he recommends the same. I either get a replacement or I buy a new phone. So, I explain to Dwight that I am not going to pay for another phone and the last thing I want is another A630. I explain to him that getting another A630 would be postponing this situation for another few months. After I explained to him that T-Mobile pulled the phones (less than 6 months after carrying them) for, among other things, the recurrent charging issue he agreed that I probably wouldn’t want another A630. So, after a 15 minute discussion on how I would think that T-Mobile would want to keep a customer that pays around $100 a month for phone service (and probably will continue to do so for the foreseeable future) as compared to losing a customer for a $350 phone made absolutely perfect sense. After this discussion and realization on Dwight’s part he realized that making me somewhat happy would probably be the best recourse. So, he agreed to sell me a phone (from a different manufacturer) for a greatly reduced cost (basically their cost) of around $77 and that he would “waive” the shipping cost as a “courtesy”. Now, I told Dwight that I am still getting hosed on this one and that I am basically eating the cost of the A630 ($350) after 6 months and that I am not too happy about that. Dwight agreed that I had a right not to be happy…but, that he could do nothing about it…ridiculous. So, Dwight gave me the phone number for Motorola….to which, he said I could carry my complaint. So, after about an hour (lunch break) I decided that the conversation was going no where with Dwight and that I needed to escalate it once again. So, I asked Dwight to transfer me to his supervisor…of course, Dwight did not want to do this and told me that there was no way that his supervisor was available or that I could contact him. So, I politely told Dwight that he was full of the smelly brown stuff and that I found it hard to believe that a supervisor at a telecommunication company was unreachable. I explained to Dwight that under consumer protection laws that he had an obligation to honestly present the facts to a consumer and that by telling me that his supervisor “was not reachable” that he was indeed violating my rights as a consumer…so, once I explained that to Dwight I asked him if that was his intention. So, Dwight immediately transferred me to his supervisor’s voicemail. So, I left Roland a nice voicemail and asked him to get back to me at his earliest convenience. Of course, I have yet to here from Roland…I am not sure when his earliest convenience will be, but I am going to bet it is not going to be ASAP. So, I left the T-Mobile store slightly frustrated, realizing that in today’s day and age that indeed the consumer is really on his/her own. So, I get back to the office…and call Motorola. Of course I get some “Foreign Customer Service Agent” (FCSA) that I can barely understand and who can barely understand me…I had to repeat my number four times…four times. Who has to repeat a ten digit number four times for it to be heard? Ridiculous. Anyway, after explaining my situation to the FCSA and relaying to her that I did not want another A630; she told me that they would gladly fix it or replace it. This, after detailing that I did not want, under any circumstances, another A630…it was like talking to a Customer Service Robot. I don’t know where they get these people. So, I told her that Motorola just lost a customer of 11 years. So, what was her response? “Is there anything else I can help you with?” Help me with…you didn’t help me in the first place. So, I just hung up…frustrated…and quite frankly pissed. In this day and age we cannot get customer service. I tell you, it is ridiculous that a company cannot help their customers resolve their issues. It makes me appreciate companies that go out of their way to resolve issues. So, having said all of that, what is my recourse? Well, I am going to write some letters to the executives of both companies and relay my “wonderful” experiences. I am not one to just take a kicking and stay down…I always get up and I always get up with my fists up. In this case, I have just taken off my gloves. This is round one…round two is mine all the way.

The Dreaded Memphis Three-Lane Sweep...A Step-by-Step Look at this Memphis Phenomenon

For those of you who are not from Memphis, have never lived in Memphis and care nothing about Memphis…please pay no attention to this diatribe. The infamous and now sorely rampant Memphis Three Lane Sweep. I am sure all of you have seen it; but, maybe you just didn’t know what happened. It goes a little something like this. You’re on the South Loop of I-240, somewhere between Airways and Perkins. You’re cruising along nicely at 70 miles an hour in the right lane and keeping up with the flow of traffic. The weather is nice, so you have the windows down and Tom Petty is on XM and the lyrics to Learning to Fly are reverberating in your soul. Suddenly and without warning a 1994 Nissan Altima with only one hubcap, a cracked rear window, a broken left rear turn-signal, a dent the size of Rhode Island in the right rear quarter panel, window tint four shades past legal, and a license plate taped to the said cracked rear window comes out of no where and is now attempting to take your space in the right lane without a turn-signal. You’re faced with a monumental decision, you can: (a) take one for the team and learn why two objects can not exist in the same space without a violent reaction, a little thing we like to call an accident; (b) slam on your brakes as the “bogey” sweeps into your lane and pray to God that the driver behind you is paying attention; and (c) swerve to the right to avoid the Scud that was just launched at you and pray, again to God, that you don’t hit a car abandoned in the emergency lane, wrap your car around a light pole, and/or lose control of your vehicle and fly through the median and end up in a ditch, while Tom Petty’s song “Learning to Fly” has just taken on a whole new meaning. You have just been the victim of…drum roll please…the Memphis Three Lane Sweep. What exactly just happened and why is it called the Memphis Three Lane Sweep (MTLS)?

I’ll break it down in an easy to follow step-by-step process:

Step 1.

The driver of the Altima Scud; which we will hence forth refer to as the “bogey” has been driving along at 75mph in the far left lane listening to his/her preferred choice of music, talking on his/her cell phone to one of their friends and/or relatives, slapping one of the unbuckled rugrats in the back all while slurping on their favorite beverage of the day. This is your “typical” Memphis driver cruising the highways and byways of Memphis; un-alert, preoccupied, and highly dangerous.

Step 2.

The driver of the Bogey, has just decided that they want to take the next exit a mere 270 yards down the road. Now at this point the rational, sane, and well educated driver will consider their options. First off, they will first decide if they can safely make the exit if they can’t they will continue to the next exit and make their way to their location without any further delay. If they can make the exit they will turn their right turn signal on and begin to look for an opening in traffic. They will proceed to change lanes, when and only if there is a safe opening in traffic. They will continue to do this while maintaining a speed relative to the flow of traffic. They will not slam on their brakes and wait for traffic to clear nor will they accelerate like an F-18 off the end of an aircraft carrier. If the traffic allows for it they will make it to their exit; if not they will, as stated earlier, continue onward to the next exit. But, we are not dealing with a rational, sane, or well educated driver. Rather we are dealing with an irrational individual, that is probably a few tacos short of a combo plate, and more than likely not well educated. So, what does this driver do, well that is the beauty of it…no one knows what he/she is going to do…they don’t even know what they are going to do themselves. That is the beauty of it all.

Step 3.

Realizing that their desired exit is now less than 270 yards away and closing fast at their current cruising speed the driver of the bogey is going to go through the following thought process before deciding what to do: ______________________. That’s right they will think of absolutely nothing. Shockingly enough they will not have a thought process before deciding what to do. That is the beauty of your average Memphis driver, when you don’t have a thought process you don’t think of the consequences of your actions. Brilliant. So, having gone through absolutely no thought process what-so-ever; the following actions are going to be caused by the driver of the bogey: (a) they are immediately going to slam on their brakes, while beginning a sharp right hand turn towards the exit that is still quickly approaching; (b) the driver will not signal nor will they look to see if traffic will allow for their kamikaze driving maneuver; and (c) finally they will not consider the reactions that may occur from their actions. Rather in their state of ignorant bliss they will head for their exit in a kamikaze like manner with no regard for the welfare, safety, or reactions of anyone else on the Interstate. Beautiful.

Step 4.

This is where you, cruising along nicely and enjoying Tom Petty, are about to meet the Bogey in the right lane of traffic. The Bogey closing in on your vehicle at 65mph and now at a 45 degree down angle has just cut off a soccer-mom in the middle lane, forcing her to slam on the brakes of her Cadillac Escalade, thereby tossing her Grande Caramel Macchiato all across the dash. The driver of the car immediately behind her has to slam on their brakes and swerve to the left to avoid permanently imprinting the hood of their car with a Cadillac emblem. The Bogey, at this point, still has no idea that they narrowly missed causing a 20 car pile-up and possible injury/death to numerous drivers and is steadily tracking for an impact with your driver-side door. Of course, the blissfully unaware and moronic driver of the Bogey has yet to look away from their exit and has no idea they are about to impact the side of your vehicle. They are on a kamikaze mission and will be damned if anyone is going to get in their way. You are now in decision mode and have only the previously stated options: (a) take one for the team and learn why two objects can not exist in the same space without a violent reaction, a little thing we like to call an accident; (b) slam on your brakes as the “bogey” sweeps into your lane and pray to God that the driver behind you is paying attention; and (c) swerve to the right to avoid the Scud that was just launched at you and pray, again to God, that you don’t hit a car abandoned in the emergency lane, wrap your car around a light pole, and or lose control of your vehicle and fly through the median and end up in a ditch, with Tom Petty’s song “Learning to Fly” taking on a whole new meaning.

Step 5.

You look in your rearview mirror and decide that the car behind you is far enough back and is not going to end up in your backseat as you slam on the brakes and lay on the horn while stringing together a string of expletives that would make a sailor blush, with the bogey narrowly missing you as they careen onto the exit ramp with the last remaining hubcap flying off. The hubcap rolls off into the distance like some eerie warning to those who actually care about their cars. You’ve just survived a classic MTLS and the best part of the whole thing is that the oblivious driver, that almost sent you to the hospital, flips you off as they drive away because you had the audacity to honk your horn at them.

You got to love Memphis.

The Week In Review

Well, the week is over and here we are about to enter into another weekend...hopefully we won't be facing another "surprise" hurricane bearing down on a major U.S. city on Monday morning. So here is my take on the week.

Judge John Roberts finished his confirmation hearings this week and will be the next Supreme Court Chief Justice. I personally have never met Judge Roberts but, from listening to his confirmation hearings I have to say that I am completely impressed. I have never heard a more polished and composed individual under such circumstances. Of course, despite his outstanding credentials some democrats won't vote for him solely based on the fact that he is a Republican nominee. Yes, there are still idiots out there. And, I am further moved to believe that Sen. Kennedy is indeed a moron. After listening to his questioning of Judge Roberts I was utterly amazed that a supposed intelligent man would repeatedly ask a Supreme Court nominee how they would rule on specific cases...asinine. So, having concluded his hearings on Thursday the "special interest" groups will begin their ranting and raving about how Judge Roberts, being a conservative, is going to bring an end to the world as we know. I can't wait to hear the brilliant intellects at NOW throw their normal moronic diatribe out there and of course the NAACP will throw their normal "interesting" statements out there. I am sure they will, as Theodore Shaw, president and director of the NAACP's Legal Defense Fund stated the following earlier this week: "Our review of the available record has led us to conclude that John G. Roberts Jr. has been hostile to the corpus of civil rights and constitutional law." Are you kidding me...Hostile towards constitutional law? I want to know where these people live and what kind of drugs they are on. Of course these are the same intelligent people that support rapper Kanye West's delirious statement that, "George Bush doesn't care about black people."

So, this leads me into Katrina and Kanye...perhaps I am remiss in saying this but, does Kanye West have a quarter of a clue about what he is talking about? Watching his ranting was similar to watching a 2nd grader talk about someone pushing them during recess..."and then...and...and...he...doesn't like me." I mean seriously does this idiot actually believe that the President of the United States doesn't like black people. Hey Kanye, have you looked at who President Bush has as his Secretary of State...none other then Condoleeza Rice. And correct me if I am wrong but, the last time I checked I think she is "black". So, Kanye get a clue or do us all a favor and quit breathing. Seriously, it amazes me that these people survive childhood. Someone with the apparent intelligence of Kanye probably played on the freeway as a young child. Stick to what you know Kanye and stay out of politics until you graduate college...one semester at Columbia College in Chicago doesn't count as an education buddy...oh, and one more thing if you are going to rant on about someone...try complete sentences...it usually helps. So, needless to say I think Kanye stepped a bit outside of his "comfort zone" and had I been standing next to Kanye, instead of Mr. Meyers, he would have been slapped back into his "comfort" zone rather abruptly with one simple question: "Mr. West what do you base this outlandish claim upon?" Which, I am sure would have stunned him into silence. And by the way, it is President George Bush...at least have some respect.

So, on Katrina. For those who think we are doing a bad job. Please submit to me a detailed thesis on how you would have handled a natural disaster effecting over 90,000 square miles with a credible warning of less than 72 hours. That's right the National Hurricane Center's own Probability of Hit analysis on Friday, August 26, 2005 predicted a strike probability on New Orleans of only 17%. Needless to say it is a shame that so many people were affected; but, we are dealing with Mother Nature here and she is the most devastating force period. Sure things could have been done differently here and maybe faster here; but, I for one think we are doing a pretty good job. Can you imagine if that tragedy took place in someplace like Sri Lanka or Thailand…oh, that’s right it did and an estimated 170,000 to 250,000 people were killed. That’s right they are still counting the bodies. In areas of Indonesia they were still finding 500 bodies a day in February of 2005. I was in Thailand shortly after the Tsunami and I can tell you first hand that our response to Katrina is light years ahead of anything anyone else could have performed. Just think of the sheer fact that we had over 300 U.S. Military helicopters in the area 72 hours after the incident performing rescues and attempting to repair the levees. Trust me getting 300 helicopters and their support to a region that quickly is amazing. Logistically speaking we are doing a great job. I know what everyone is going to say…what about the poor people at the Convention Center. Sure, we probably could have swooped in and gotten them out of there earlier. But, seriously where would we have taken them. I think people are forgetting that it is not just a matter of moving people from Point A to Point B. Unless you have point B prepared and ready to handle a situation, all you have done is transferred your problem from one point to the next. So, having said that…for anyone who has ever attempted to handle the life-support functions for 30,000 it is a bit more difficult then simply moving people from one point to the next. Have I handled 30,000 people, no…I have not; however, my father has and he will tell you it isn’t a walk in the park. So, before you start jabbering about this or that…actually sit back and think about what it takes to literally move a small city. How many towns, cities, do you know that are around 30,000 people? Now, think of moving that entire town, to an unprepared location, in 72 hours…can’t be done...how about a week…hmmm…probably a little more practical. If you will recall as of September 4, 2005 the Convention center and the Superdome were cleared out, that is six days…and both locations had more than 25,000 people at them. So, think about it in that context and you may not be so quick to judge; in fact, you will probably think the Federal Government did a great job under the circumstances and that is my position. Am, I just a sideline guy here…no, I am not I am headed down to Louisiana next Friday to aid in relief work. So, expect pictures and a full report in about 10 days.

Well, what else has happened this week? We have President Putin in Washington D.C. today. Is it just me or am I right to not fully trust a former KGB officer? Well, I think Putin is moving in the right direction; but, I firmly believe he is always watching out for his numero uno or the good ol’ Russia. All I say to you Mr. President Bush is watch this guy.

What about Iran? Here is my take on Iran and “yes”, I have some experience with the fanatical Iranians that are slowly taking over that country…and “no” I will not disclose that experience. The fanatical Iranians are pouring into Iraq and attempting to destabilize that country. I simply ask what in the world is going on when a known terrorist is now leading a nation. Iranian President Mahmood Ahmadinejad has been positively identified by at least six U.S. hostages as a ringleader in the 1979 U.S. Embassy takeover. And I am going to go out on a limb here and say I bet you none of those guys will ever forget the faces of the terrorists that held them captive. He has also been identified by former Iranian President Bani Sadr as Ayatollah Khomeini's liaison with the hostage takers…hmmm…sounds pretty much like a “sure thing” to me. And, to add icing to the cake he stands accused of the murder of a Kurdish leader in Vienna by officials in Austria who say they have compelling evidence and want an arrest warrant sworn for him. Oh, but that is not all folks, as mayor of Tehran, he was one of the principal forces behind a campaign to recruit and train suicide bombers throughout the country. So, how does a guy like this become the President? Well, simply put – Iran has quickly become a fundamentalist country under control of radical Muslims that are all about Fatwa’s and bringing down the great Satan (that would be the United States). I would have to say that to truly understand how fundamentalist Muslims have taken a firm grip on the country you have to understand the revolution that occurred in 1979. So, go get some books and learn about it. Read “In The Walled Gardens” by, Anahita Firouz an awesome book that gives you some insight in how vastly different the country is today from the 1970’s. Of course, I will clarify that I think Iran still has its own internal fight to win. The young generation there is not too happy with the radicals that are leading that country. So, there very well could be another Iranian Revolution. I for one hope there is; for if there isn’t and the radicals continue to secure that country we could be seriously facing a terrorist nation much like Libya in the 80’s and with the resources, wealth, and fanaticism available in Iran the West could be in serious trouble. Remember folks that all things start small. Remember how World War I was sparked to ignition by the assassination of Franz Ferdinand, Archduke of Austria, in 1914 by Gavrilo Princip, a Bosnian-Serb student, in Sarajevo. I guarantee you that Mr. Princip did not envision that his gunshot would result in a 13 kiloton nuclear weapon being dropped on Hiroshima on August 6, 1945 and a 20 kiloton nuclear weapon being dropped on Nagasaki a day later. Little things can have big consequences and they are not always anticipated. So, I would consider a known terrorist becoming president of a rather fundamentalist country an item we should all watch carefully.

I would be remiss if I did not mention that the new season of Survivor started…Survivor Guatemala. Am I interested in Survivor, not really but since I did almost make it on the show. I am curious as to what I would have been doing. Apparently it started with a 13 mile trek through the jungle with all their gear. Well, no problem and I guarantee you I would have advised that everyone drink a bit more than they did and take a little more time. It is better to be fit for the long haul. Those folks are in serious trouble for the rest of their stint. In ideal conditions they could recover rather quickly but, they are definitely not in an ideal situation. I imagine some of the men and women will be suffering directly from the “sprint” that they did on the first day. Remember that the turtle beat the jackrabbit.

Rockstar INXS…we are down to the final three and as I have said all along...they are going to pick JD. It is not a matter of the other two being bad or anything at all...on the contrary, they are all very gifted. I just think that JD fits with INXS more so than the others do and a band is all about fit.

So, on that note...I hope everyone has a great weekend. Stay safe, don’t drink and drive and remember to say your prayers to God because we are all very blessed.

Katrina - Not a National Shame

So, I get home last night after a long day of contributing to society to find the latest edition of Newsweek awaiting me.

Now, I must be rather clear on the front-side; I think that Newsweek is probably one of my least favorite magazines and only receive it through a free subscription. I do enjoy reading it though, solely based on the fact that I enjoy seeing how the liberal media can twist all things to support the left.

The cover states the following: "Poverty, Race and Katrina - Lessons of a National Shame." How dare an organization that literally serves news to the entire world take such an anti-American position as "lessons of a national shame". Katrina is anything but a national shame - Katrina is a natural disaster - a disaster like the 2004 Tsunami, a disaster like hurricane Andrew, a disaster like the San Francisco earthquake, etc. It is not a "national shame" and to those who say that the response by the government (local, state, and federal) was a shame - I say open your eyes and educate yourself prior to making assinie statements.

Katrina hit New Orleans on August 29, 2005, roughly 96 hours after it hit Southern Florida as a weak category I hurricane. On August 25th, as the storm moved across Florida and headed for the warm waters of Gulf of Mexico what, where, when and how Katrina would strike again was anyone's guess. No one knew exactly what was going to happen next and independent of hind-sight no one today can look back to the 25th of August and say, "yeah, I saw all of this coming." It wasn't until Thursday, August 27, 2005 and Friday, August 28, 2005 that Katrina's future could start to be correctly determined. I have thoroughly researched the National Hurricane Center's (NHC) advisories, forecasts, strike probabilities, etc. over the last several days; and here is what I have found. As of Saturday, August 27, at 2200 EDT the NHC had still only predicted a 26% chance that the eye of Hurricane Katrina would pass within a 65 miles window of New Orleans...a 26% on Saturday night. So, having said that...and listening to the whines of all the "talking heads" of where was the support, where was the staging, where was the relief workers, where was the military...as of Saturday night there was only a predicted 26% chance that New Orleans was going to get hit by Katrina. So, my question to all these people is - with only a 26% chance that New Orleans was going to get hit...why move everything there as so many have apparently thought appropriate?

As of Friday, August 26, 2005 the NHC predicted a strike probability on New Orleans of only 17%. With that information in mind and the majority of individuals already beginning their weekend all over the United States, what would all the detractors have done? Would they have called out the 82nd Airborne and had them head to Louisiana. Now remember that the 82nd Airborne is one of the only "major" U.S. Military units that is available for rapid deployment. Would they have staged relief supplies for hundreds of thousands just outside of New Orleans. let's be honest with the weekend upon the United States and a still unpredictable storm, there really was nothing more to do than wait and see. It is not always the best answer, but sometimes it is the only answer.

I am not going to deny that mistakes were made, that things could have been done better; I am going to tell you that I am proud of the way America has responded to this natural disaster. We have given more and provided more to the people that were effected by Katrina than any other natural disaster. I just wish that some of the people effected would give as much back as they are being given.

Opening The Garage

All - you heard it right - Farage's Garage is now open!